I believe that children should not be raised as male or female simply based on their anatomical sex. As children, we are taught that boys like colors such as blue and black, playing with trucks, and roughhousing, whereas girls like pink and purple, playing with dolls and  playing in a polite manner.  While often times children DO want to partake in activities that are linked to their anatomical sex, by raising them with these ideals, we are limiting their freedom.

I have two male cousins who are both currently about six years old-- one on each side of the family.  (Side note: The boy on my mother's side of the family comes from a conservative background, and the boy on my father's side comes from a liberal background. ) One day, the cousin on my mother's side asked his father and uncle if he could dress up like Dora the Explorer-- his sister had a costume and he was jealous.  The two men immediately told him that he could not, and that he would have to dress as Dora's male cousin Diego if he wanted to be an explorer. After this, there was no further discussion. The cousin on my father's side was completely encouraged when he told his parents he wanted to be Tinkerbell for halloween, paint his nails, and take ballet lessons.  When he was questioned at school by a teacher about his choice to dress as a "female" character, he did not think twice about his decision.

These stories indicate a major difference in morality between two boys of the same age.  This is hugely reflective of the opposing ways that they were raised.  The boy who was shut down when expressing his desire to dress a certain way clearly regards the "authority" foundation as either above or equal to the "fairness" foundation; the cousin who was allowed to dress a certain way holds "fairness" to a higher standard than "authority".  In Haidt's Ted Talk, he discussed how Liberals often have a two-foundation morality, and Conservatives often have a five-foundation morality.  I think this explains why the two boys reacted in different ways when an authority figure questioned their decision.

Though many new parents may feel the need to raise their child in the traditional way (meaning that they partake in their specified gender activities), it is important that we realize while attempting to change guide them on a specific path, we are acting immoral in the sense that we are denying them their freedom to choose the activities they want to participate in.  In Fluehr-Lobban's article, "Cultural Relativism and Universal Rights", she discusses the fine line between a cultural folkway and denying a person their universal human rights.  She states, "We should not let the concept of relativism stop us from using national and international forums to examine ways to protect the lives and dignity of people in every culture"(93).  This idea can be applied to this particular issue in the sense that we should not allow national/cultural gender norms to affect the way in which we raise children in generations to come.

I think there are many ways in which we could redirect the gender "norms" kids grow up with.  First off,  it is important to realize that it is okay to buy toys, clothes, etc. for your baby that don't necessarily fit the "blue or pink" or "dolls or trucks" standard.  Until your child is old enough to make decisions, it is the choice of the parent how they dress, but they should not assume their child wants to wear pink because they are anatomically a girl. When kids become old enough to choose, they should not be persuaded to wear a certain color or pattern or play with certain toys.  Rather, they should be provided with a variety of options and have a chance to pick what THEY personally prefer, regardless of whether it aligns with gender norms.  Parents need to learn to accept that their girls can wear blue, or their boys can play with dolls.  When kids are raised without specific gender limitations, it becomes possible for them to express themselves from the time they are young.